"I'm not afraid of you laughing when I said it. Just last night, you told me that you would buy manors, yachts, and private jets abroad in the future. In the near future, I will take me to the United States to play. When I went to Xiangjiang, I was still constantly delusional, thinking of traveling with you and chasing the longing and intoxicating scenes and scenes of the "poetry and the distance" you mentioned.

"I believe, and I have some confidence. As long as I continue to stay by your side and persevere, one day, the delusions above me will be more or less fulfilled.

"These delusions have made me full of energy, and I feel like living in heaven every day. Every morning, the first thing I think about when I open my eyes is to come to work, come to you, and be with you.

“Until Xiaoya’s departure.

"Xiao Ya's departure was like a loud slap on my face, shattering all my fantasies. I finally realized that I had done something wrong and hurt some innocent person.

"That night, before I was about to give up all my disguise, remove all the burden on myself, and just let myself move with my heart, ignore it, and think about other consequences, I hesitated countless times, because reason told me that once I break through the relationship between you and you, my good friends, and the things between us will be known to the people around me one day.

"However, by chance, I can't help but throw myself into your arms like the moth that is blowing into the fire.

"Wang Bo, I have been with you, committed to you, and gave myself to you. Until now, I have never regretted it! And to say something that makes people feel unspeakable, even a little shameless to a girl, I have never been as happy and so happy as I was during the SARS school lockdown! I never thought that as a woman, it would be so beautiful and wonderful! I am grateful and cherish all the beauty and joy you have given me!

"Thank you, Wang Bo, I will treasure this wonderful memory between us for the rest of my life!

"For a while, I thought that since Liang Ya has left you and ignored you, wouldn't that be my best chance? From then on, I can monopolize you and have you completely. I can walk by your side openly like countless ordinary lovers around me. If I make such a request to you with shamelessness, I guess you won't refuse.

"This kind of thought and thought was once extremely strong. I even cheered myself up and told myself that people are selfish. On the road to pursuing love and happiness, there is only result, no right or wrong. Since Liang Ya chose to give up, why should I blame myself too much? How big is it for me? Since the first day I met you, I have never taken the initiative to buzz you? Even though I was gradually attracted by you, began to miss you, like you, and finally fell in love with you, I have always tried my best to restrain my feelings for you. And if I can't slap a single hand, how big is it for me?

“For a long time in the past, I have used this kind of quibbling, this kind of self-deception to anesthetize myself, and to convince myself and rationalize the fact that I am with you.

“I’m almost about to succeed.

"It was not until Xinyue that Xiaoya had actually traveled across the ocean and flew away to the distant America!

"Liang Ya's going abroad made me deeply realize the despicable and hateful role I played between you and Liang Ya. No matter what fallacies I used to excuse myself and exempt myself from guilt, I am the disgraceful third party, and the most direct culprit who drove Liang Ya away.

“I should feel guilty, ashamed and sorry for this!

"I'm not regretting it. As I said before, I don't regret what happened at all. If things retreated a few months ago and happened again, the final result would probably be like this. I probably still can't resist your charm and my own impulse. I willingly ran downstairs and called you, and then cheered and looked forward to you staying with me.

"I am not blaming you. After all, whether it is me or you, as long as you are a human being, you cannot overcome human weaknesses and cannot erase human nature and instincts unless you are a saint. But no one has seen a saint. Saints are just legends. We are all living beings and the general public.

"Xiao Ya's resolute and unlooked departure not only made me smash my unrealistic delusion, but also made me unable to face Xinyue, Xiangxiang, Xuexue and the others again. I couldn't even face Rowling. Whenever I was with them, I felt countless gazes thorning me like thorns. They were talking quietly beside me, and I would see it as a whisper to me. When they looked at me, I would feel guilty that these gazes were filled with sarcasm, disdain and mocking.

"Now, even when walking on the campus outside C, I feel like countless people pointing at me behind my back, and criticizing me incomprehensible.

"Wang Bo, if it were just pressure from outside, I don't think I would surrender and give up the love I'd probably never meet again in the future.

"But I cannot ignore my heart. The continuous judgment from conscience and morality is what made me choose to leave you in the end.

"Wang Bo, I like and love you deeply. It is you who have allowed me to see the vastness of the world and experience the beauty of the emotions between men and women.

“I am sincerely grateful for this.

"And for Liang Ya, I'm very sorry. She may not believe it, and I don't want to hurt her at all. I once envied the twists and turns between you and the twists and turns, and finally became a perfect relationship after the erosion and test of time. This rare perfection in the world should not be destroyed, at least it should not be destroyed by me. Otherwise, even if I eventually replace her, I will bear the shackles of guilt and will never be at peace for the rest of my life.

"Wang Bo, go find Liang Ya, explain everything to her, and win back her hurt and sad heart.

"The past between us, including last night, was regarded as a dream, the most beautiful dream, okay?

"This time I left was a sudden and it would cause a lot of inconvenience at work, so I will continue to use the phone call for a while and explain the situation to the person who called me and ask them to find you directly in the future. After a while, I will change the number again.

"I'm leaving, Wang Bo. You don't have to look for me or call me.

"Finally, no matter where I am, no matter what I do in the future, I will always bless you and Liang Ya!

"I sincerely wish you all my best wishes and take me to Xiaoya for my sincerest apology.

"Zheng Yan.

“September 13, 2003.”

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Thank you very much for the reward of "Save No Drink" for a total of 2,000 starting coins!

Thanks to "Eternal Night Dog," my brother for the reward of 500 starting points!

Thanks to the “kevinzkr” brother for the reward of 500 starting coins!

Thank you to the book friends 20161220223110902, Magic Gate Wog, and the two brothers and sisters for their affection!
Chapter completed!