"Sister, please tell me the truth. Why do my mother want to go back?"

My elder sister thought about it again and said, "She was on the phone with me two days ago and said that she was not used to living in a small house. She and I lived with a house of 120 square meters at home. She said that the small house is on the first floor and the ventilation is not very good, and she felt a little bored."

My eldest sister's house was assigned from Chen Sheng during the divorce. After Chen Sheng stopped asking her for a relationship with her, my mother got older and lived with her so that the two of them could take care of each other.

I said, "You have lived in that house, which is transparent from north to south and has good lighting. I bought the first floor because I was thinking that she would not be tired from climbing the stairs, so why would it not be transparent?"

"Hahaha!" The eldest sister suddenly laughed, "I don't know this. I have to ask my mother about this feeling, and she said that the feeling is not clear. The old man's feelings are different from ours, right? Our 120-square-meter house will indeed be brighter."

"But your house is on the fifth floor. Doesn't she feel pain in climbing the stairs? If he is not afraid of climbing the stairs, I can buy her a fifth floor, which is cheaper, but I really can't afford a 120-square-meter house here now."

I said this without any emotion, and it was all about the truth in my heart. There was nothing to hide when my brothers and sisters talked, and my elder sister was not unhappy.

She just smiled and said, "We can't control what the old man has. Your second sister and I know that you have tried our best. Then my mother will do whatever she wants. When she wants to go to your place, let her go. If she doesn't want to go, she won't go. You don't have to think too much. Your second sister and I know that you and Jiang Xi are filial! So when she leaves, you should live a good life as before, without any psychological burden."

"I'm very sorry, I didn't even be filial to my mother," I said.

The eldest sister smiled and said, "Don't think so, either. She knew in her heart what you and Jiang Xi did for her mother. She would be happy if she felt that you and Jiang Xi wanted to be filial to her. As for how she lived, it depends on how she felt comfortable and how she would come."

My elder sister said this, and I can only say, "Okay, that's all. Then I'll send my mother back on the weekend. If my mother wants to come in the future, you can send her again."

"Okay OK!"

Things settled, and my mother left like this. To be honest, I really regretted that I worked so hard to borrow 700,000 yuan and was under the pressure of repayment, just to allow my mother to enjoy the family happiness brought by my son by my side. However, the old man always has the habits and ideas of the old man, so I can only follow her.

It was late at night and when Jiang Xi and I were lying on the bed, I was still regretful when I talked about this.

Jiang Xi said, "It's nothing. Since your mother is not here to live, we will rent out the house."

I said, "What if she wants to come and live again in two months?"

Jiang Ximian looked at me expressionlessly and said, "Although she is your mother, she can't be unreasonable. She can rent a house worth more than 3,000 yuan a month. It's impossible for her to stay there for the time she comes occasionally. If she just comes occasionally, let her make do with us. When will she come to live for a long time, we will return the tenant, and that's what we decided!"

I,"……".

I could see that Jiang Xi was a little unhappy about this matter. After all, we both paid a lot for it at that time. It was a big deal, just hoping to fulfill our filial piety, but it was not successful yet. But she didn't say anything, just dealing with the subsequent matters in a adaptable manner.

I thought about it carefully and I thought she was right to do this. After all, our family had a loan of 700,000 yuan and a monthly repayment of 5,000 yuan was still under pressure. Renting the house and renting out more than 3,000 yuan a month can greatly alleviate our pressure.

Our lives have returned to their original state. My heart to be filial to my mother and my desire to live the world have failed. There is no happiness or unhappiness. It depends on this. We don’t have to be too serious and let it go. As long as we are with the person we love, everything will be fine.

The only thing I care about and worry more is that I hope there will be no problems with my work. However, in 2017, the cold wave of middle-aged employees in the IT industry really came. In the midst of the crisis, the landmark event was that an engineer from a large state-owned enterprise left behind two children, his wife, orphans and widows, and his elderly parents, and jumped from a tall building to die.

In the eyes of laymen, that incident may be regarded as a story, but in the eyes of our insiders, it is a sign of a major accident and a crisis.

The entire IT industry was in turmoil, and I felt like I was on the shaky Titanic. During that time, I had insomnia every day!

Sure enough, my company also experienced a layoff crisis, and all employees in their forties were laid off, but the company would not lay off employees directly because the direct layoff would require compensation of n (working years) + 1. Therefore, the company will use various methods to transfer employees to an inappropriate position, which will lead to two results...

The first result is that employees are unable to take up new positions and are forced to find a job again. Regardless of whether the employees have found a new job or not, as long as they resign, the company does not have to pay any compensation to employees.

The second result is that employees will inevitably not be able to do a good job and achieve performance in unsuitable positions. Then the company will propose that a certain employee’s performance does not meet the standards at the right time, so it will reasonably dismiss a certain employee, so that the company will not need to compensate the employee.

This is probably a trick that many companies like to play, whether it is a state-owned enterprise or a foreign enterprise. Such tricks make it impossible for already vulnerable employees to complain because the company does not violate China's labor law. They take advantage of loopholes in the labor law to lay off employees in disguise.

If an employee must go to arbitration for a few months' salary, he will only have 10% chance of winning, which may take a year and a half. Therefore, most employees choose to deal with it by eating coptis chinensis and swallowing it up if they have any pain.

During that time, every employee of ours was panicked, cautious in his words and actions, and was afraid that the cold wave would blow on us. He worked hard on the surface, and sent resumes in secret and asked someone to contact him. However, almost every company's feedback information was, "Our company is also laying off employees and will not accept any social recruitment for the time being."

It is conceivable that what kind of fear will be in our hearts? Not only employees, but also the crisis of the management class is not small, because unless the management class is particularly excellent and can lead the performance, it will have a high salary and will be even more difficult to find a job?

Anyway, the entire IT industry is very cold.

What worries me the most is that I happened to me. During the tide of layoffs, I was also one of them who was transferred to a position that was not suitable for me.

Before this happened, I never told Jiang Xi that I was panicked. Of course, I didn't want her to follow me and get angry. After this happened, I thought about it carefully and could not hide it from her anymore, so as not to catch her off guard if the matter became serious and would catch her off guard.

After dinner that day, I said to Jiang Xi, "I may be unemployed. I was transferred to a position that was not suitable for me. I am now confused. I don't know if I should accept this job. If I accept it, I may be the person who was fired from poor performance in the future and will not get a penny of compensation, because this is simply a conspiracy. If I don't accept it, I have not found any other job yet, and may have to cut off my income, and our family will face a big economic crisis."

After hearing what I said, Jiang Xi was not very panicked, and still said calmly, "I think it's okay. Our pressure is not that great. Do you think I don't know about the IT industry if you haven't said it during this period? How could I not know about the IT industry employee of a state-owned enterprise jumped off a building and committed suicide? I have already thought about it. If you are unemployed, we will move to a small house. This big house can be rented for nearly 6,000 yuan, and the house in Hangzhou can be rented for about 3,000 yuan, and the total is more than 9,000 yuan. If we take down the 5,000 yuan of loans we repay every month, our family can still have 4,000 yuan of living expenses. It may be a little tight, but it does not mean that we can't live."

"What if there is anything unexpected? Or you need to spend money when you get sick?" This is what I worry about the most.

Isn’t there a saying that goes well? What we ordinary people fear the most is not to be sick if we have anything, and nothing will not be rich if we have nothing. And isn’t the biggest gap between rich and poor people a disease?

Jiang Xi smiled and said, "If I really need money, I will sell a house. We were not afraid of anything before. What's scary now? Do you think so?"

I saw Jiang Xi's confidence from her sunny smiling face. She seemed to have thought about everything and made sufficient preparations. But this time, I still couldn't feel at ease and happy.

When it was late at night, after Jiang Xi was asleep, I got up alone and walked to the window of the living room. I looked at the dark night outside, and the face of the employee who jumped off the building always appeared in front of me.

For some reason, my thoughts seemed to be in a dead end. I couldn't help but wonder about his psychology because I was facing the same problems as him.

According to the news, his family's conditions are not very bad. Although he has a mortgage, he doesn't have to live without a job. But why did he choose to jump down? I...it actually depends on it.

If you are about fifty years old, if you retire, you will retire, and your mentality may be more acceptable, but at the age of 40, you will be asked to retire. And we Internet workers seem to do nothing after we retire.

I read a post before, which roughly means that people should not stick to one road and go to the dark. While walking one road, they should be prepared for themselves and prepare for a second way of retreat. He also gave an example to the author of "Forensic Qin Ming" and said that a doctor has prepared a second way to be a writer for himself. If his career as a doctor cannot be done, he can still settle for the second best as a writer. He will never feel the despair of life because he has lost the career of a doctor.

But how many of us programmers in the IT industry have prepared a second path for themselves? At least I don’t have that ability. I work overtime every day and work extra points every day, so how can I have the spirit and ability to prepare a second path for myself?

I think people with personality like me have no choice but to work in an IT company, and I don’t have the confidence to do anything else well. So when faced with such things, it makes people feel that there is no way out. This is not just a matter of money, but it seems that dignity is trampled on. We have been reading books for so many years, and we are often called high-tech talents, but we are just 40 years old, and we are in the stage of rich experience and can shine and heat, but we are suddenly abandoned by this society?

That feeling of failure will make us feel unspeakable depression and despair.

If you jump down from the 18th floor, you will definitely feel a very pleasant feeling. With a "bang", all the failures and helplessness will disappear. Others can no longer care about it, so let yourself be free!

For a moment, I could understand the engineer who jumped off the building. If I were free from worries or impulse, I was thinking that on the day I was fired, maybe I would like to end all this, because I didn’t want to face a failed life, and I didn’t want to face myself who was so hard and failed.

Just as my head was walking into a dead end and my thoughts were getting deeper and deeper, I heard Jiang Xi’s shout coming from the bedroom, “Ah! Husband! Husband!”

Her screams interrupted the dark thoughts in my heart. My beloved wife can always touch my heart.

I rushed to the room with a quick glance, and saw her sweating and a look of horror.

The moment she saw me, she hugged me in her arms and cried, "Husband! I dreamed that you jumped off a building too, don't be impressed! We are not short of money, we can live a good life, I have a way to make you live a good life, even if the money I earn is not enough to support my family, we will not be short of living expenses if I sell a house. If you feel that there is no spiritual pillar, I will open a restaurant for you. The news a few days ago was reported, did a university professor quit his job and opened a courier reception point at home? University professors can, you can, and there will be many things to do. Don't be impressed! If you have any shortcomings, how can I live with my children? We love you so much, do you bear to let us live a heart-wrenching life for the rest of our lives?"

Jiang Xi's words were like a needle that pierced the tip of my heart, causing me to wake up in pain for a moment.

What am I thinking about just now? Did I beside the ghost? It was the devil who was tempting me to die.

When I woke up, I was shocked by my thoughts and felt a lot of sweat. I also want to thank my wife.

Imagine why she had such a dream? Of course it was because she was worried about me, and she sensitively discovered the strangeness of my emotions.

If I have such a wife and such a cute child, I really don’t know what it means.

Jiang Xi wiped her tears and tried to continue to persuade me, "Everyone will encounter some setbacks in life. Husband, your life has a wife and children who love you so much, and a happy family. You have been very successful. In fact, those who can't think of suicide may not really be better than others. They are just poor in psychological endurance and have more miserable people than them. And the midlife crisis you are experiencing now is a drop in the bucket compared to those who are seriously ill and plagued. What is there to seek death?"

In the past, every time I listened to Jiang Xi’s reasoning, I felt it was very helpful and could accept and praise happily.

But this time, I just want to say that sentence. I understand the truth, but sometimes people like to get stuck in a stubborn position and it is difficult to get out of it after entering a dead end.

Seeing Jiang Xi worrying about me so much, I hid all my suffocation and asked her with a smile, "Then do you think I want to accept this job of transfer?"

Actually, I would ask her this question purely for the purpose of changing the topic, because in my heart, I had no choice but to accept the transfer. As for when I was asked to be dismissed, I could only say that I would take one step at a time.

I really feel...I have no choice!

However, what I never expected was that Jiang Xi gave me another answer!
Chapter completed!